To Wink Or Not To Wink

Flipping through hundreds of online profile pics and your short on time. You spot a picture that interests you. You don’t sit and stare in love at first site but you are interested. Your mouse hovers over the WINK or EMAIL link. Oh, What to do? To Wink Or Not To Wink  – that is the question!

To Wink Or Not To Wink – You Have To Put In The Effort To Find Someone

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If you are going to set aside time to preview profiles, then you have to put the time into reaching out and corresponding with the person. Yes, a WINK is OK. But, if you are really interested in someone, then you should email. Join a few dating sites and vary your profile and put yourself out there and go for it!

An Email Is More Personal Than A Wink

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When I am looking at profiles, if I am very interested then I will take the time to write an email. If I am somewhat interested but still on the fence, I will still email because you never know if the email response will wow you.

Send A Wink If You Are Intrigued But Not Totally Sure

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I send a WINK if I like the pic but I am not sure we are 100% compatable. I like what they have to say but think there is a possibility that we may not jive on key issues. So, I will wink and if they respond, I will then evaluate the correspondence because as we all know, things are not always what they seem. And many times, people may not be compatable on paper, but in real life they could be.

Take A Chance And Reach Out To Anyone Who Interests You

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Online Dating…Can You Spot The Catfish?

catfishGiven how long I’ve spent in the online dating arena, both doing it and writing about it, it was inevitable that I’d eventually snag my very own catfish. A “Catfish” is someone online who is portraying themselves falsely, pretending to be someone they’re not, sometimes for childish reasons and sometimes for nefarious reasons.

I’d seen the documentary and TV series that popularized the term and of course Catfishing is a serious topic on the Dr. Phil show, but in all this time I had yet to encounter one of this breed myself….til last week. Here is what happened and how I sniffed out this rotten fish and dealt with him.

I saw “Cuddle536” (YES…his real online name) on His profile was clear and well-written in solid English sentences. He had one, very nice profile photo of him holding a cat. Plus, he lived in a very small town nearby to me. I wrote to him…and he wrote back with:
I would like to get to know you. First, I would like to see if we can be friends. I suspect you are very selective in who you are looking for. I know I am looking for someone very special who is attractive, fit, beautiful inside and out, and family oriented.

Then…It Got Interesting

Still well-written and coherent, he went on to say that he didn’t check his account often and would I use his real email. I have a private email account that I use ONLY for online dating and is not connected to any of my personal info so I felt comfortable using that and agreed to this. Which is where the fun began. He wrote:

I believe strongly in love and her values,I am originally German-Swiss,I have two dogs and two cats as well…you can tell i love animals and animals lovers are true lover…is that true ?
Commas instead of periods?? Weird sentence structure and that “true lover” thing set off a tiny alarm. Someone who wants to be friends first doesn’t send a leading comment like that. I went to recheck his profile and realized he’d hidden it….another clue. Now I was curious. I wrote and asked him a few questions about things I vaguely remembered from his profile. Three days later I got:

How are you and hope that you are doing Great. I haven’t heard back from you and thought to check in and say hey and perhaps to ask if i did or said something wrong,i was really enjoying the getting to know each other process.
Hmmm, I knew the email went through as I didn’t get a delivery problem message. I didn’t think it went into his spam folder as my previous messages were received. Now I’m fairly certain this clown is not who he’s portraying himself as. Curious, I resend my original note. This time he writes back.

Yes you did reply to my email and i responded as well but i think maybe either you did not get my response or i know but glad i am writing to you now. He ended the email with: Enjoy the rest of your day and know you have a man who is very curious about you and with the best of intentions towards you as well.
Now I’m certain that I’ve snagged myself a Catfish. Why? Aside from the steadily decaying grammar and punctuation, no one who is sincere and has the “best intentions” will need to specifically point this out in an email. So now I’m really curious as to how he’d react to an email that is off the “script” he’s obviously trying to guide me into (Plus…I’m sensing an impending blog post on this exchange…LOL). I write and ask some specific questions:

I think you said you live in Alpine? How long have you lived there? Like it? Does your daughter go to college?  Do you have a large family? Small? Are they in the area? And tell me about your job/career. What do you do? Do you like it?

Surprisingly he writes back:

Getting to know more about each other is all about asking and getting answers yes! I have being living in Alpine for 5 months now…and yes i do like/love it. My daughter does not live with me,she lives and school in England,i agreed to that because all i want is for her to be happy,its being very difficult since after the passing away of her mother. I am the only child of my parent whom are both late now,i do have relatives but very small and we hardly keep in touch only occasionally.
Holy cow! I was laughing out loud as I read that. The poor orphan boy…how convenient!! At this point I was DONE with this A-hole…but couldn’t resist one parting shot, I emailed:

Hope you’re enjoying Alpine, I have friends who live there and they enjoy it too. It’s a very, VERY small town so if you haven’t met them yet, I’m sure you will soon.

Now Michael, I have to ask you a strange question. Did someone write your profile for you? I ask because the style of writing, grammar, tone, and punctuation is TOTALLY different in your emails. Besides being a designer, I’m also a writer so I notice these things.

I didn’t expect an answer to that one and of course, never got one. I’m sure he knew he was busted!

When You’ve Snagged A Catfish

So, what did I do? Nothing. Yep, nothing. I didn’t email back because THAT’S what you do when you realize you’re in contact with someone who’s not who they say they are. Through the LifeBytes project we’ve gotten many stories from men and women who’ve had years long relationships with people online only to find, when they finally meet them, that they are not who they portrayed themselves to be. I never really understood how that could happen and quite honestly, I still don’t.

This is why I think the “catfish” get away with what they do…too many singles let their hearts and imaginations rule instead of their heads. Here’s the unvarnished truth: You can’t fall in love with someone when you only know them online. You can be infatuated with the IDEA of that person, you can be enamored of what they write and how they write it. You can be a victim of your own imagination, picturing how you THINK they are in real life. But you CANNOT actually be in love with someone you’ve never met face to face.

Here’s hoping we all catch only Starfish from now on!

Check out our latest post on Singles Warehouse!

He Wrote WHAT??

“I don’t know why you would contact me? I know our profile says we are 93% compatible, but you are a Catholic and I am a reformed Protestant and I only want to be with someone who is also Reformed.”
<<Well, it sure would have been nice if you said that in your profile.>>

Thank you for writing. But, I only want to date someone who is within 10 miles of where I live. You live outside the area I want to travel to.”
<<Then, why did you indicated you would travel 50 miles on your profile? And are you really that lazy that you can’t drive more than 10 miles to find love? Good riddance>>

<<Ugh … no thanks!>>

“Let’s hookup.”
<<No. Let’s hook you up to some shock therapy. Maybe then you will learn to send appropriate emails.>>

“Where is your photo dude?”
<<I am not a dude>>

“Thank you for your smile and email. I am glad you liked my profile and got the true sense of who I was.”
<<I am fine. Thanks for asking. I like long walks on the beach and beautiful sunsets. Thanks for asking. And, I like dogs and red wine. Thanks for asking. Yep, I got the true sense of who you are alright.>>

“Have you found anyone on this site?”
<<Ugh … well, if I had, I would have my profile up and looking for someone now would I? Just sayin … “>>

“Hmmmm, you’re pretty. I can’t believe you’ve never been married.”
<<Well, with charm like that I know why you were never married.>>

“Thanks for your email. I just met someone and we’ve gotten serious so I want to give it a shot. Good Luck in your search.”
<<Thanks. But, I’d like to ask why you are online constantly every day if you met someone you are so serious about? And, why even write me with a lie? Just askin … >>

“How about we get to know each other?”
<Great. Why don’t you start by asking a question and writing more than 8 words to start off getting to know each other>>


What are these guys thinking? Apparently, they are not. I shake my head when I read some mundane, self-centered, ignorant and lazy responses.

This is a dating site where you supposedly trying to get to know someone. Ask questions. Give them a compliment. Show a bit of who you are … you charm, intelligence, wit and interest. You owe it to yourself and having a decent relationship to do that.

Come on, you don’t have to be a literary genius. But, try just being normal and starting a conversation without getting weird or inappropriate.

I have seen the trend towards these kinds of responses. I hope this turns around.

Has anyone had any experience that is similar? Men, have you had odd responses from women? We would love to hear them!!

Good Luck!

Thanks, Mariann

The Art Of Conversation

With the advances of electronics in our daily communication, we have lost the art of just conversing. I love that word – conversing – and I love the word chuckle too. But, I digress.

We all fall victim to the texting and email and don’t actually just talk. I know I have and it did not serve the relationship well.

Recently, I have been very frustrated by my online communications. Men write 1-2 sentences. They don’t ask questions. They don’t keep the conversation going. Why is this? They answer what you have asked and they hit SEND. Please guys – can’t you have a little more creativity than to write, “yes, I like Broadway plays. I made soup for dinner but am tired and have to go to bed and will email later.” Really? That’s the best you can do? Really? Just another sentence … just one more to say, “I hope you had a nice week and did you have fun or do anything special. Look forward to hearing from you.” Not much more effort, but it shows you are interested and want to keep the communication going.

It makes me wonder if they are interested or are communicating with so many different people that they can only write 1 sentence per email.

Even when you meet in person, I have one MAJOR issue with my conversations with MEN. They do not ASK questions. I don’t understand why? It’s so simple. Are they incapable? Are they so self-absorbed that they don’t think outside their own world?

Conversation has a purpose. It is to share about yourself AND find out about the other person. Show some interest … it will take you a long way.

If some of our male readers could enlighten me as to why they don’t ask questions, I would love to understand. Please share!


Do I LOOK Like The Perfect Pen Pal?

OK Cupid, what's with the pen pal thing?I recently joined OK Cupid. I’d been putting it off for some time since, the one time I scoped out the site, I had the impression that it would be LOTS of work to build a profile, answer questions and interact with members often enough to actually connect with anyone. Free site or not, I was feeling way too lazy for that.

But I finally decided to give it a whirl and see what was going on there. After all, I could just close my profile if I didn’t like the site…or “working” it exhausted me. Surprisingly, I’m finding it easy and fun to use. What I don’t like is that most of the men I’m contacted by here seem to want a pen pal rather than a date.

The first man who contacted me wrote a beautiful, chatty and friendly email as an ice-breaker. I was completely impressed, good writing is one sure-fire way to get my attention. For about three weeks we wrote back and forth and finally, he mentioned that it might be nice to get together. Of course I wrote back in agreement and mentioned that my upcoming week looked open..lets plan. I have never heard back from him. I’m on the fence as to whether to send him a quick note asking if he’s still interested…leaning towards sending it…I’ll keep you posted on how that unfolds.

In the meantime, I found another man, lives close by and sounded down-to-earth and intelligent, so I wrote a short note to say hi and ask if he’d like to write, talk, maybe meet. He wrote this back: “Perhaps”. One word?? Cat got your keyboard??? I DO try to be open-minded and give everyone the benefit of the doubt, especially with these first emails, so I wrote again to see if I could elicit at least a handful of English words, preferably strung together into a sentence. I even sent my cell number with the note that, if he preferred speaking to typing it would be fine to talk on the phone. One, two word responses went on, back and forth, for an email or two. I’ve now given up trying here.

I know that men can be reticent about pursuing an online gal if they’re “not sure” about her. That’s fine, I totally accept that. But for cripe’s sake…call if you’re not sure. Even if you are sure…CALL, or say you’re not interested…it’s OK to do that. It is also OK to write more than one word at a time. Guys, tell me…is this a new trend in online dating? Or am I just pickin’ the wrong apples?

I will though, stay on OK Cupid because it is kind of fun and …you never know. Also, the questions you can answer there are interesting, weird sometimes, but interesting….Hmmmm…I sense a future blog post about this.


“It’s Not You, It’s Me”…And Other Lame Excuses

I end my ice-breaker emails to potential dates like this: “If you are interested then please write back and we can talk…maybe meet. If not, then I wish you the best in your search.” I do this to let the recipient know that it’s OK to NOT write if you’re not interested. I know many will disagree, saying that it’s only polite to answer each and every email with a “yes, I’m interested” or “thanks, but no thanks”. Even sites like recommend answering all your emails. I respectfully disagree. If you are interested – write back, if not – move on, and I’ve become more and more adamant about this over time. You see, I’ve had more than my share of ridiculous responses to emails and I’m at the point where I find them borderline insulting.

I recently emailed and then spoke with an online match. The emails went well but it was obvious during the phone call that we were most likely not a good match. I got an email from him the next day saying that he was so sorry that he would not be able to meet me, but he was going to be very, very busy at his job and would be traveling most of the time and so was putting his membership on hold. …He is still on the site EVERY DAY.

I emailed someone who emailed back saying that he met someone and she seems very special and he was going to date her exclusively, but thank you so much for the email and if it doesn’t work out he will surely get in touch with me…He is still on the site EVERY DAY.

I occasionally get the canned sentence supplied by the dating site. The verbiage varies from site to site but basically says the same thing: “I’ve just met someone and want to see where it goes.” They are all (you guessed it)  still on the site EVERY DAY.

And yes, I did once get the proverbial Junior High School comment “It’s not you, it’s me.” It took all of my self control (between gales of laughter) to not write back with “Well, yes it IS you..and I better not catch you making out with Mary Jones behind the bleachers at the Pep Rally this weekend!!”

I know I’m blonde, but I’m really not stupid, nor am I blind (well, at least when I have my contacts in…LOL) I can SEE that you’re still dating online. So here it is: If you feel uncomfortable saying or writing a rejection then just say nothing. If I don’t hear from you in one or two days I WILL FIGURE OUT that you are not interested. It saves me the annoyance of having to waste my time reading your lame excuses. IT’S OK. We are big boys and girls …just move on.


The Black Hole of Dating Emails

Strange Emails!I found a great article on this week, Why Guys Don’t Bother to Call, which lists all the reasons men have for never calling you after a seemingly great first date where you have laughs, conversation and chemistry….Interesting…apparently grown men are prone to channeling their innner 16 year-old girls. I say this because I was a 16 year-old girl at one time. I over-analyzed ever word, gesture and shred of body-language produced by whichever boy I was currently “in crush” with. I had no interest in any boy who wasn’t rating high on the “cool” scale – much to my current self’s dismay at the last class reunion wherein the nerdy former classmate has turned out to be a talented, successful HUNK of a guy…Oh well.

Men will drop an apparently good match uncategorically because she has an annoying laugh or other odd quirk, seems to be interested in pursuing a serious relationship…OR pursuing a not serious relationship, and other real or imagined “reasons”. Of course, since I started dating online I’ve always suspected that this was the case. I’m pretty sure it works that way for the initial emails we send to one another before the coffee-or-drinks-or-dinner first meeting.

Last week I emailed someone who’s profile seemed interesting. He emailed me back with a compliment on my writing skills while including a few jokes about his own lack of such. He also wrote ” I can out cook most people and love to do crazy stuff. Jump from planes run with bulls and fish in the jungle. OK so now what do you think?” [sic]

Here’s part of what I sent back: “Do you jump from the plane before or after you run with bulls and fish….in the jungle?? LOL just kidding.” I can still hear the sound of crickets in the silence of my in-box. This was last week and I’m sure I’ll never hear from this guy again. Why? He’s still active on the site so he hasn’t met anyone else. I’m pretty sure I didn’t include any inadvertent comments which would lead him to believe I’m a nut/psycho/axe-murderer/high-maintenance/clingy/boring (worse than being an axe-murderer)/stalker/vegetarian, or ANY other possible deal breaker.

So, I’m going to believe that my somewhat sarcastic (but in the cutest way:) humor didn’t…um…let’s say resonate with him. And I’m fine with that. I want to meet the guy who bursts into gales of laughter when he reads some whacko comment that I’ve just written or uttered. I want to meet the guy who can throw me an appropriate comeback. I want to meet the guy who can go head-to-head with me in a sarcastic-comedic throwdown!

Know anyone like that? Send him my number, OK?


Man Up & Get Off The Fence Honey!

I met someone on about two months ago. His head shot was so-so, not bad, not great. His profile write-up was really nice though. He seemed happy and energetic and sincere, very sincere. These are things I look for when I’m surfing through the online dating pool. I wrote, he wrote back, we spoke on the phone, we made plans to meet at a local Panera’s.

The date went well, I thought. No fireworks but a nice friendly connection. He brought pictures of his family, saying that he liked to show dates a bit about himself and his life, but that he wasn’t comfortable posting them online. Smart and thoughtful. This was a good thing.

We ended the date with a friendly kiss on cheeks and an exchange of “real” email addresses so we could make plans to get together again, and the following day I emailed him to say that I had a really wonderful time talking with him and was looking forward to speaking again. Very nice, positive but not pushy email. I never heard from him again. Why? I don’t know…I DO know that we connected well when we spoke and met. Anything could have happened. I never speculate about these things…a girl could drive herself crazy that way. I just move on. And so I did.

A few weeks ago I met someone else from Match. Now, with this guy there were sparks. Charming emails and an even more charming (and long) phone call. We met for drinks and appys at a local Greek restaurant and had a blast. This evening included the body language that let’s you know he’s as interested in you as you are in him. Our date ended with a chaste but VERY warm kiss (two in fact) and a wonderful big hug. I sent him a short text the next day saying that I really enjoyed our evening and was looking forward to connecting again. A week went by, by which time I’d completely written him off. And then he called, apologizing for not getting back sooner, he’d been very ill and then away on business. Lie? Who knows. I like to give the benefit of the doubt …ONCE, so I did. Another week went by and this time I called him to say hi. Nice conversation ensued. We haven’t spoken since and I’m pretty sure we never will again. Why? I don’t know (please see comment in previous section about my opinion of speculation).

So on I go to the next profile, and maybe the next, etc. I don’t think there’s an etiquette book on how to politely date online, but there should be. Miss Dating Manners would say:

Gentlemen, man up and get off the freakin’ fence. If you’re interested say so, if you’re not interested say so. We don’t read minds, body language – yes, minds – no. And if you’re worried about getting slapped by an angry woman…it is perfectly acceptable to send a short email saying, thank you but I think there’s someone better out there for both of us, best of luck in your search for love….SEE, now that wasn’t so hard, was it?


Smart Girl’s Guide to Dating Online: Avoiding Predators

A girlfriend recently described a very harrowing, near miss that she experienced with an online predator. She met, through a major online dating site, a very charming, successful professional man. He was a perfect gentleman through two dates…and then my friend Googled him.

He had lost his professional license because of sexual assault charges, he’d been convicted of fraud and passing bad checks, he’d been accused of assault on other occasions, the list went on. My girlfriend is smart, very smart. She contacted the dating site, forwarded them the Google links, made sure he was banned from the site. Is he on other dating sites…maybe…probably.

It’s scary enough to turn one off to online dating forever. But, in all honesty, you can meet someone at a party or a bar, or any number of places who could turn out to be a predator. What’s a Smart Girl to do?

One woman sued over an alleged assault. She claimed that the site should do background screening. Well, I agree and disagree with that blanket claim. Sure, I’d feel safer knowing that potential dates have been screened, but this is no guarantee. Bad guys (and gals) have a way of slipping through the cracks and finding ways to burn us. I disagree in that I believe we need to take ownership of our lives and our dates. We need to be aware that there are some really bad apples out there and do our own screening. And….I know I’ve written this over and over, but I’ll write it again….we need to take online dating S L O W L Y. Take the time to get to know people you meet online.

I’m amazed at how many single men and women turn into naive twelve-year-olds once they have a computer screen in front of them and a mouse in their hands. They believe (or maybe just desperately WANT to believe) the profile that talks about love and sincerity and wanting a lifelong relationship with their “soulmate”….without question. Sure, that profile may have come right from the writer’s soul and be the picture of honesty….but you don’t know that yet. You’ll need to write to this person, THEN you’ll need to speak to this person, THEN you’ll need to meet this person IRL. THEN you’ll need to meet them again and again and again and hopefully learn more about them each time. I know, seems as if it will take forever. But look at it this way, if this person is really who they say they are and if this is “the one” for you….you will have a lovely lifetime to find out all about them and they you.

Ah, but that initial period, when you’re searching through dating profiles, winking, nudging, writing emails and setting up dates. That’s the tricky part. How do you weed out the potential “Big Bad Wolves”? There are some great resources online for hints on how to accomplish this. Online Dating Magazine has an excellent article on how to safely approach those initial contacts. I especially like their advice on phoning for the first time (like dialing *67 when calling from your home phone so your number isn’t traceable). is a site devoted to identifying and avoiding Sociopaths and has great information on how to spot these, often smart and charming, snakes. Take a look at the personal assessment test to see if you’re a potential victim.

My best advice is:
1. My dad, one of the best salesmen who ever lived, always told me “If it sounds too good to be true…it is”. So read profiles with a cynics eye, not a romantics. Remember, what’s written there could be true, false or just a glossy exaggeration of the truth.

2. Never meet someone without talking on the phone first! That conversation will tell you a lot. You’ll invariably talk about what impressed you both about the others profile. Listen…do they hesitate to go into detail?

3. Meet in a public place…VERY public. Drive yourself there (I personally make sure that I drive myself to a second date too, if there is one). Text or call friends to let them know where you’ll be. Again, keep your eyes and ears open to clues that this person may not be who they’ve advertised themselves to be.

4. If you can garner their full names or any other pertinent information, like names of companies they’ve worked for or the schools they’ve attended…google them…and don’t let this make you feel awkward – chances are your date is home googling you too.

5. If your date at any time makes you feel uncomfortable or “sort of all-over-icky” – as one friend put it, END communication with them. Period. Trust your instincts.

6. If your date is all that he/she says they are, you’ll know. You’ll have that sense that they’re sincere. Your googling will show that they are indeed who they say they are and you’ll be able to let the romantic in you take the lead and enjoy this budding new relaitonship. If they’re not…then you are a Smart Girl and will know enough to move on in your search for love.

Safe dating,

Rerun: The World’s Biggest Candy Store

This is a post I originally ran about two years ago. The email exchange still cracks me up…..and YES, this is the actual email convo that I had.

With so many singles dating online it’s hard to not be picky, and it’s so easy to carry that to an extreme. If this person is good the next will be sooo much more perfect!! Here you are, you’ve found the girl who likes the same movies that you do, enjoys philosophical conversations and has the looks and bod that you’ve been dreaming about since you were 13 and realized that there’s more to life than playing street hockey. Excitedly, you read her profile further. NO, it can’t be! She’s a New England Patriot’s fan. How can you, a die-hard Giants fan even consider meeting such a tasteless chick… you can’t. And so you move on to the next profile without a thought to the possibility that you’ve maybe just cyber-dissed the mother of your future children.

Those of you who’ve never dated online are reading this and shaking your heads, “no, she’s exaggerating, that can’t be true”, and all you online daters are saying “Yup, uh huh, you’re right on the money.” It’s like that old Seinfeld episode where Elaine breaks up with a man because she doesn’t like the way he eats peas. I sometimes wish that Seinfeld were still airing, I’d love to see that gang dealing with online dating.

Oh wait, we don’t need Seinfeld, the real world of online dating is so much more fun than watching sitcom reruns. Sometimes you don’t even need to meet the person to know that they’re channeling Jerry or Elaine. Here’s an email experience that I had a while back. Anything similar happen to you?

From: NewAgeAdonis(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)
Subject: alert: NewAgeAdonis has winked at you!
To: Creativegal(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)

NewAgeAdonis just winked at you! Out of millions of members, he picked you! Flirt back right away with a wink, or better yet, an intriguing email.

For the uninitiated, a “Wink” is a quick way to let someone know that you’ve seen their profile. This spares the “winker” the annoyance of having to actually string some English words together into a coherent sentence. Normally I would have deleted a mere wink, but NewAgeAdonis’s profile looked interesting. So I forged on:

From: Creativegal(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)
Subject: Thanks for the Wink!
To: NewAgeAdonis(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)

Hi NewAgeAdonis,
Can I just call you “New”…? LOL. I took a look at your profile and I see that we have a few things in common. Like you I also enjoy creative pursuits and outdoor activities. What is your fav thing to do outdoors? Do you enjoy theater, museums, etc? So hard to know what to write after just a “wink”. Please write and let me know what intrigued you about my profile. Maybe I can answer some of your burning questions.

From: NewAgeAdonis(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)
Subject: Hi
To: Creativegal(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)

Just now had a chance to look at your profile. You seem to have a nice picture of yourself posted. Is it current?

From: Creativegal(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)
Subject: You Just NOW looked at my profile?
To: NewAgeAdonis(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)

Didn’t you look at my profile when you winked at me? OK New, are you one of those guys who sends out huge numbers of winks to see if one sticks? Have I been the victim of a “Drive By Winking”…:)?

From: NewAgeAdonis(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)
Subject: RE: Hi
To: Creativegal(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)

Sorry, I’m a very busy person and don’t really have time to read through profiles. Nor do I have time for many emails. I would prefer to meet in person but, before we do you should be aware of some very important ground rules that I have.

First, I am an Ovo-Lacto vegetarian. I feel very strongly that eating meat is detrimental to human health and to the survival of the planet. Also, I have an extremely sensitive sense of smell and would insist that you not use perfume, skin creams or any type of scented shampoos before our meeting.

From: Creativegal(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)
Subject: So Many Rules, So Little Time!!!!!!!
To: NewAgeAdonis(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)

Nut, I mean New. It’s so nice that you are a vegetarian; everyone should have a little hobby to pursue. Do you mind that I’m a Carnivore? It’s OK if we meet at a vegetarian restaurant; I will just bring a slab of raw buffalo meat for myself. Please don’t worry about perfumes or other scented products. I don’t use any of these. In fact, I am a Non-Lavar proponent; I do not bathe … EVER. I believe that water, soap, other cleansers and perfumes are detrimental to the planet and to humans.

I never again heard from NewAgeAdonis…go figure…LOL. Sometimes a little sarcasm is just the most therapeutic way of dealing with dating frustration.